Nov 12, 2016

You Are Allowed To Want What You Want

Repeat after me…

“I am allowed to want what I want.”

Say it out loud. Don’t worry… I’ll wait.

“I am allowed to want what I want.”

Done? How did that feel?

If you’re like most people, there’s probably a combination of a little bit of fear/nervousness, mixed in with a deep sense of peace and calm.

It can be confronting to allow ourselves to recognize that our needs and desires are not unreasonable, but in fact, completely fine and acceptable.

We have never lived in more amazing times. We live in an era of unprecedented abundance, across all areas of life. And now is the time to be selfish.

In Your Love Life: You Are Allowed To Want What You Want

You are allowed to want to be sexually attracted to your partner.

You are allowed to want to be intellectually attracted to your partner.

You are allowed to want to feel emotionally safe with your partner.

You are allowed to want to feel spiritually connected with your partner.

You are allowed to want a partner who is blonde, brunette, slender, fit, chubby, overweight, bald, or big-nosed.

You are allowed to want them to be employed. Or financially self-sufficient. Or slightly arrogant. Or shy. Or taller than you. Or any other number of things.

Whatever you want in a partner, you are allowed to want what you want.

In Your Work Life: You Are Allowed To Want What You Want

You are allowed to want to work 12 hours a day, or eight, or two, or zero.

You are allowed to want to give to the world using your innate gifts.

You are allowed to want to affect millions of people… or one person.

You are allowed to feel excited by your work. You’re allowed to feel deeply fulfilled by your work. You’re allowed to not resonate with people that resent Monday’s and thank god it’s Friday.

You are allowed to have the exact kind of impact that you want to have on the world, by providing value in a way that lights you up.

With Your Physical Body: You Are Allowed To Want What You Want

You are allowed to want to wear luxurious fabrics that complement your body.

You are allowed to want to be in the best shape of your life. You’re allowed to want to be in love with your body. You’re allowed to put on as much or as little make up as you want.

You’re allowed to want the exact type of sex that you most enjoy. You’re allowed to want a partner who massively turns you on. You’re allowed to want to reach sexual ecstasy on a regular basis.

You are allowed to embrace yourself, as you are, in this very moment.

All too often, we lose sight of this simple truth… but it’s true. You are allowed to want what you want.

It isn’t self-indulgence… it’s self-honouring.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Ps. If you enjoyed this post, you’ll likely also love reading:

The Hardest And Most Important Thing You Will Ever Do

4 Honest As Fuck Questions You Need To Ask Yourself Often

How To Figure Out What Your Ideal Sex Life Looks Like

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
7 Simple Rules For Authentic Happiness
Feb 13, 2017
Jordan Gray
7 Simple Rules For Authentic Happiness
I am not a doctor. I am not a researcher. I am not a happiness expert. I am a human being who has (at the time of posting this) lived for less than thirty years, and has accumulated thoughts about how life works. These are some of those thoughts. I hope that you get value from them. Here are seven...
Continue Reading
Do You Regret An Entire Relationship? Here’s What’s Actually Going On
Mar 24, 2019
Jordan Gray
Do You Regret An Entire Relationship? Here’s What’s Actually Going On
I was talking to a client the other week, and he mentioned that he regretted a year long relationship that had recently come to an end in his life. This isn’t the first time I’ve heard someone saying that they wished they could undo the fact that an intimate relationship had taken place. If this is...
Continue Reading
30 Life Lessons From 30 Years Of Living
Apr 24, 2017
Jordan Gray
30 Life Lessons From 30 Years Of Living
It was my 30th birthday a few days ago. Roughly 30 years ago I came into the world a fat, loud, fuzzy little baby. And now I'm a slender, quiet, fuzzy big man. Oh how the times have changed! I'm pretty sure I've learned some things in my 30 years of existing... but at the same time, I feel like the...
Continue Reading
7 Facts About Sex, Love, and Attraction That You Need To Know
Jan 14, 2014
Jordan Gray
7 Facts About Sex, Love, and Attraction That You Need To Know
Before studying attraction and human sexuality I found myself judging people a lot. When people cheated, I found no empathy in my heart for them. When men wouldn't settle down with women who were clearly amazing for them, I dismissed them as non-committers point blank. When people complained...
Continue Reading
How To Fully Release Difficult Emotions That Hold You Back
Aug 7, 2016
Jordan Gray
How To Fully Release Difficult Emotions That Hold You Back
Do your emotions wreak havoc on your life? If you've lived for more than a decade or two, chances are there are some deeply buried emotions inside of you that hold you back in your life. You may not be consciously aware of these stuck emotions on a daily basis… but they are clogging you up and robbing...
Continue Reading
Cold Feet Or Wrong Person?: 5 Ways To Know
Aug 31, 2024
Jordan Gray
Cold Feet Or Wrong Person?: 5 Ways To Know
Have you been lying awake at night, thinking to yourself... 'Hmm... cold feet or wrong person?' Fortunately, there is a huge difference between having normal, healthy, appropriate nerves or a sense of hesitancy around the person you're engaged to, versus there being legitimate red flags that should...
Continue Reading